School is like a second home for many kids as they spend so much time there, they get to hang out with friends and explore their interests. Sometimes they feel so comfortable at school that they forget that it’s an academic institution and some things should stay at home.
Sometimes kids bring weird things to school and teachers have to take them away for safety reasons. There were some surprising answers to GlytchedTTV‘s question, “What was the worst thing you had to confiscate from a student?”
1. A Sea Bass.
I had to take the sea bass from the student who brought it to use in the playground at break time because he was going to hit people with it and challenge them to a duel.
2. Box Filled With Set Timers.
My mom has told stories about what she has taken from students. The usual prank items are whoopie cushions. A student was playing with a weird box. The box was not open. She couldn’t put it in the bin. She put it in a cabinet. It starts ringing about an hour later. Furiously. It took some doing to get the box open.
The kid’s parent was a chef. The kid had grabbed every timer in the house, set them for the max amount of time, locked the box, brought it to school, and played with it so it would get confirmed and ring loudly. The class was loud and happy. A true agent of chaos.
3. Gold Nasa Pen.
I never got my gold nasa pen back after my teacher took it because it wasn’t fair to the other students.
4. A Chihuahua.
While waiting for the bus to pick him up, a 1st graders chihuahua slipped into his backpack. His backpack was on a hook in the hallway.
5. 2 Hard Seltzers.
My wife is a teacher and one of her first-graders brought 2 hard seltzers because her mom said they were good after a long day.
6. Mom’s Wedding Ring, Dad’s Car Keys, And A Bottle Opener.
There is a preschool teacher here. I had to convince a 4-year old that his mom’s wedding ring should be put in a special box on the front desk instead of on the finger of a six-year-old girl he had a crush on.
Later he brought in his dad’s car keys and a bottle opener.
7. A Baby.
My mom told me that a kid came to the school with a bag and the teacher noticed a baby in it. The girl wanted to show her friends. The baby vomited all over himself and the parents didn’t notice he was missing.
I had to take away hand sanitizer from a student who drank it to get drunk and threw it up everywhere.
9. A Pineapple That All The Boys Would Worship.
We had a pineapple that the boys would worship.
10. Note Filled With Drawings Of Cartoon Butts.
Not the worst, but definitely my favorite. I saw a few 4th graders pass a sheet of paper to each other instead of doing what they were supposed to be doing and I looked at the note and one of the kids’ faces looked like it was over and she begged me not to look at it. I opened it to see what they were writing about. They told me that they wanted to have a contest to see who was the best at drawing cartoon butt.
11. A Live Wild Badger In A Box.
A kid in grade 2 brought a live badger in a box. We had to leave because animal control was called. The kid’s parents didn’t know how he caught the badger, and he didn’t tell us where he got it.
12. A Doobie.
Kindergarten is studying butterfly life cycles. The little guy found chrysalis on the porch of his house. The kid brought me a doobie and asked if we could see how long it would take to turn into a butterfly.
13. A Knife, A WiFi Jammer, And A USB Killing Device.
It’s the most dangerous. A knife from a young person. It’s the most annoying. An 8th grader has a device that can kill a computer.
14. The Fish In A Vase.
During locker checks, they found a fish in a vase. Someone added a lock to the locker. There was a live Betta fish in a large vase inside. The room is fully decorated. Someone clipped a book light to the top of the vase so fish wouldn’t be in the dark all the time. It resided in the coach’s office for at least that year because no one claimed to know who it was or how long it had been there.
15. Bullets And A Cat.
The worst thing. Bullets from a young child. I had to clear the room so I could look for a gun.
The best thing. A cat is in a high school student’s backpack.
I had a clay dinosaur project taken away from me by the teacher who assigned it and I wouldn’t stop playing with it. I didn’t get it back.
It makes sense that I kept playing with it. I am a full-time ceramic artist.
17. Ear Piercing Gun.
Ear piercing gun. I had to stop them from piercing each other’s ears.
18. A Piece Of A Broken Beer Bottle.
A piece of a broken beer bottle was taken from a 6-year-old by my 1st-grade class. He was the sweetest kid. He was asked to bring a weapon and hide it in the sand in order to get back at another kid. Both boys were suspended for a few days, but I tried to do more life lessons than that.
19. A Styrofoam Head.
Some boys had drawn a smile on a styrofoam head that had some eye holes. They took it to every class. I put it out of its misery because it got old and shabby. The staff room trophy is great.
20. A Coors Light.
The child mistook a beer for a soft drink. The student was embarrassed. I giggled. It was kept for evidence by the principal. He kept it in the fridge in his office.