It’s easy to underestimate how many parents feel inadequate and it’s usually because of something in their lives that doesn’t live up to the ideal models they’ve seen at other people’s houses either in person or on social media. Honesty isn’t so refreshing for everyone and can spark some surprisingly heated discussions, as we’ll see in one lazy mom’s frank example of the mess four children can make.

It’s not as if the pressure is only coming from within since it’s prevalent for strangers to shame parents for engaging in the behavior of keeping a household they disagree with.

When parents show an honest view of how messy and chaotic their lives can often be, there can be much value.


After four kids worked their magic for four days, a woman named Bri James uploaded a video to TikTok showing what her house looked like.

As she put it, “This is what happens when two really lazy adults have four kids and don’t clean up after themselves.”

The lazy mom intended her video to be a way of motivating herself to break through her sloth and hunker down, even though she anticipated a lot of criticism for the state of her house.


In her words, “I have not done dishes or picked things up and this is what my house looks like.”

A tour of the house that showed clothes, toys, and furniture pieces strewn everywhere and dishes piling up made it clear to the lazy mom that she had to start cleaning up that day.


James anticipated that she would get a lot of comments that argued that the house was dirty and that she should not have allowed things to progress to this point.

As one commenter said, “That’s dirty. Just because there isn’t mold on the walls doesn’t mean it’s not.”


They shared that growing up in a dirty house caused them trauma and that it was her responsibility as a parent to keep things clean.

Some felt that the children could only be blamed for the mess because they felt that letting it lay for so long set a poor example for them and that they didn’t have to clean it either.


Other people in similar situations countered these comments by saying that their kids can make their house look similar within hours.

Since the other commenters didn’t know what was going on in James’ life, these more supportive users didn’t feel the need to criticize her for a situation she was about to address.