Yolanda Hadid is talking openly about her experience as a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills cast member and the effects it had on her mental and emotional well-being.

After attending a Project Healthy Minds event at Hudson Yards in New York City to honor Mental Health Day, the TV personality and former model chatted with ET’s Rachel Smith on Monday.

Hadid commented on the impact starring on the Bravo reality show had on her and the part her struggle with Lyme disease played in the troubles she had on the show among the discussion about the value of talking about mental health concerns and taking care of your own mental well-being.

“The first season I went on, I was diagnosed with neurological Lyme disease, and I struggled every day of the season,” Hadid recalled. “I kind of stayed on because I thought, ‘OK, I’ll be better next season.’ I didn’t know Lyme disease was a life sentence. And now, here we are 10, 12 years later I’m still struggling with it.”

“I always thought ‘Next season I’m gonna do better. Next season, I can fully understand,'” she added. “So I was never [working] with a full set of brains on the show.”

Hadid said that she had disagreements with some of the other cast members in part because of her ailment and that they had accused her of fabricating her illness to get attention.

“Those things were very hurtful, and not just hurtful to me but hurtful to my children and my family who loves me,” she shared. “And they knew I was fighting for my life. So, from that perspective, it wasn’t a good experience for me. And, you know, that was the taste I was left with.”

Hadid was asked if she would ever think about doing the show again, and her response was a resounding “No, I wouldn’t.”

“It was an experience you take on, but at this point in my life, I couldn’t. I’m too sensitive. I couldn’t deal with that back and forth between women,” she explained. “It’s not my communication style or something that’s good for my life.”

“I believe I want to be a woman who is for women, about women, with women, I want us all to hold hands and support each other and get each other through the difficult times of life,” she continued. “I don’t understand that somebody would wake up and want to hurt somebody with words or behavior.”