Although we are connected with each other through social media sites, we feel embarrassed when asking for help. We think that the mental health topic is taboo. So, we must not discuss it openly. 

But that’s not true and there is nothing wrong with asking for help. That’s why some folks on Reddit went above and beyond this time and listed the various signs that they found to actually be cries for help. 

Here are a few of them.


Coming from personal experience, I often cared massively for other people and their well-being, hoping that they would do the same for me. In the midst of this, I became ‘the helper’ yet I found myself never being helped. I suppose in a way you stop caring for yourself and start only caring for others.


Sleeping all day and having no interest.


Lack of interest. Gamer all of a sudden no longer games? Gardener let his plants die? Social butterfly now hides in a cave?


When someone has obviously been crying or tears up without apparent provocation, even in a very public setting, it can be a sign that they’re in too much pain even to try masking it.


Oversharing and lack of filter goes hand in hand with depression.


Second hand suicide, when they joke about being killed in an accident. This is usually because they feel there are people in life who need them and they don’t want to commit suicide themselves.


When someone is constantly busy so they don’t give themselves time to think. Also, when someone gives up on a lot of basic things like cleaning or washing up because they can’t think about anything except what’s bothering them.


Sudden drastic improvement in mood of a depressed person, it could be a sign they have a plan to commit suicide and feel better because they know it’s gonna end soon.


In my experience, becoming easily angry and argumentative has been a sign.


Saying, ‘I’m sorry,’ for everything or taking the blame for things that shouldn’t even have a blame.


A reduction in food consumption. I’ve found when I’ve fallen down the hole and I just stop caring anymore I don’t eat anywhere near as much as I normally do. Instead of having the standard 3-4 meal things a day I’ll be lucky to convince myself to have 2 as I simply don’t care anymore


Reaching out and being overly nice to friends both close and casual with the hope that they will reciprocate and eventually ask them how they’re doing, so that when they open up it’s not about being a burden, but because they were prompted to do so.


It may seem a bit obvious, but when someone says that they don’t see themselves living past a certain age, or acting surprised that they made it to a certain milestone in their lives.


Becoming withdrawn is a very common one. Self-deprecating humour is something you should watch out for, too. It’s often a sign of depression/anxiety.


Giving a lot of personal possessions away without wanting anything in return.


The person stops caring about their appearance and neglects their hygiene and grooming because in their mind they are thinking, ‘It doesn’t matter, so why bother?’


Day dreaming tooooo much, or way harsher on themselves


Nah, I’m fine.


When they start cutting off contact. If that outgoing, happy person suddenly ‘just isn’t up to it,’ or always says, ‘Maybe some other time,’ then something is wrong.


People that are suffering and feeling isolated will start to lose their ability to thermoregulate. They will feel cold all the time. This will lead them to wear extra layers or heavier clothes than would be normal for conditions, taking longer hotter showers, always the first to grab a throw to cuddle under. There’s a potential evolutionary reason for it, if you’re feeling lonely and isolated, then your body telling you that you’re cold will force you to get closer to those in your pack to stay warm. Close physical proximity encourages better bonding. Better bonding ends loneliness.

Now, some people are what we in The North call “freeze babies”, that is to say that they just don’t tolerate the cold. And some people are really like that. Some people just are colder than the rest of us. But if you’re at, say, the beach and everyone’s out in their swimsuits because it’s just too damn hot otherwise, but you see someone off by themselves in a sweater and pants looking pensive, nervous… that person’s going through some [stuff].


Being more silent than usual. A lot of people miss it, or out of of as being ignorant. No that person is struggling and scared of judgement or abandonment.


Becoming attached to objects or other non-human things is one I have noticed quite a lot about some people I know who have struggled.


Purposely avoiding sad and difficult topics. Sometimes when a person is constantly feeling like s**t, the last thing they want to do is bring up more negativity when hanging out with people they enjoy being around. Oftentimes being with friends/family can be a brief escape from always feeling awful, and so bringing up negative topics can ruin this feeling of escape and make the depression feel never-ending and suffocating.


Reckless behavior. It’s not always “funny” or badass. There is often a “nothing matters anymore” thought behind or a deep feeling of emtyness which can be filled for a short time with risky behavior.

Leaving a group of people, sometimes even online, without an obvious reason. Some people tend to go away or even push away because they want to see if there is an opposite reaction, like testing if they are still wanted in a situation. Not all people who isolate want to be alone.

When somebody acts like they hadn’t much time left, even if they seem to have. Not really a cry for help, but maybe a suicide red flag. I do it myself. I often stress about how I want to do some things in a small ammount of time because I really don’t plan living past a year from now.


Marked differences in behavior where the person becomes way more positive and energetic than normal. We tend to think of these sorts of changes as being good, but any sudden and large enough change in behavior is something you need to keep an eye on. This is especially true if they are going from a very negative pattern of thinking/behavior into an uber-positive one very quickly.


Excessive drinking when they usually don’t.


Bad decisions looking for short term happiness with no regard for how it will damage their life in the long run.

Getting a neck tattoo, buying a Mitsubishi, that sort of thing.