Keeping a secret is not easy because there is always a constant urge to tell everything to someone. But the fear of people’s judgment doesn’t let anyone of us share our personal secrets with others.
There are many things that become a secret and haunt us. In your case, maybe you committed a petty crime and got away with it. Maybe you had a regrettable one-night stand. Or maybe it’s not that extreme. For example, some people hide their political and religious views, especially when they believe no one else will agree with them. Some do not reveal their finances too, whether they have a lot more or a lot less than others think.
David Ludden, Ph.D., and professor of psychology say “secrets can be psychologically damaging because the secret-holder has no opportunity to discuss their contents with other people. When we have problems, it helps to share them with someone who can provide us with insight on how to deal with them. But when it comes to secrets that are highly immoral, we feel shame and are reluctant to share them. (Often for good reason, as well.)”
To get the burden off their back, many turn to churches and bars, priests and bartenders. But fortunately, there’s another place that might do the trick.
A social media project, called Fesshole is offering a platform to everyone who wants to confess. A Google form is designed to keep their anonymity and many, many sets of ears, so they know their confession is heard. It might not bring you salvation, but if there’s a chance for peace of mind, why not take it?
Scroll down to have a look.
We got in contact with the person behind Fesshole, Rob, and he told us, “It came about after chatting to my mate Chris and he was moaning about the old internet and how you could post a complaint about your job or your life on a web forum, and nothing went viral and the only people who read was internet nerds. You didn’t get sacked.”
Now, the situation is quite different. If you vent online about your crazy boss, chances are it might go viral enough for your story to reach them as well.
Anyway, Rob and Chris continued with their conversation, and they “got to talk about how semi-anonymity through obscurity was a good thing in many ways.”
“So I thought I’d make a place where it’s free for Chris to moan and even if it did go viral, it wasn’t going to ruin his job or his life because his name is not on,” the man running the project explained its origins.
Rob keeps a record of how many people submit their confessions and it’s about 150-180 per week.
He doesn’t overthink the process of which ones to feature on the account. “[My choices are] based on scrolling down the list and reading and picking out the ones that I think will work. Funny or interesting really,” he said. “Or my judgment of what I think the world will find funny or interesting.”
When you look at it, Rob’s content selection method is kinda meta. “I think scrolling down whilst picking echos how people read Twitter, just hunting for that interesting bit,” he pointed out. “So this is Twitter where I’ve pre-chewed the meat.”
But with so many submissions, running the account requires a fair share of time and effort. “I’m in and out of the spreadsheet (whilst doing other stuff too) all day and every day. That means I’ve read over 3 million words (3,178,532) simply picking the confessions.”
Rob said his followers engage with stories that revolve around workplace stuff, sex, and schadenfreude, but mostly they seek reading about the human condition.
“So much online is now stuck in a terrible culture war and trying to push you this way and that way, but Fesshole is (I hope) slightly outside this and saying there is another world we can exist in, even if it is just for 5 minutes, one where we just laugh about what it is to be alive. Or feel a bit guilty about laughing,” he explained.
Have you also done something and have gotten away with it? Or you have confessed it?