Life as a mom is not fun. It is rewarding and filled with personal growth. It is tiring, nerve-racking, and cumbersome to cater to your little spawn’s everyday needs. For the rest of your life. There is one more thing you can do to get over your troubles, and that is to read these mom jokes that are entertaining for everyone. Laughter is the best way to give you a mental break. This is our selection of the funniest mom jokes that we have found, all of which you can read in between feeding time, changing diapers, and cleaning up the mess.
The jokes are trying to show what it’s like to raise kids. These parent jokes will relate to your experiences with each word, from kids trying to outsmart you every step of the way to you trying to explain to them the workings of life and doing the workload of at least twenty people. It will give you something to laugh at. If these jokes are too close to you, you will be reassured that you are not alone on this quest to raise a decent human being, which is undoubtedly the hardest task of them all.
Since you don’t have much time before your baby wakes from their sleep and requires your attention, why don’t you check out the funny jokes? Share this article with your friends and vote for the best mommy jokes that made you laugh.
1.
I asked a police recruit during an exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?”
He said, “Call for backup.”
2.
“My mum just bought our cat a Christmas stocking even tho we are Muslims and don’t even celebrate Christmas?? She was like “We don’t know what religion he is we can’t force him to be Muslim” he’s a cat?!?!”
3.
“Asked to switch seats on the plane because I was sitting next to a crying baby. Apparently, that’s not allowed if the baby is yours.”
4.
Your neighbors brush their teeth when your mom’s voice is so loud.
5.
A kid asks his dad, “What’s a man?” The dad says, “A man is someone who is responsible and cares for their family.” The kid says, “I hope one day I can be a man just like mom!”
6.
Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, silence is suspicious.
7.
“My 4YO fell off his scooter, and before I could help him, he stood up, dusted off, and whispered to himself, “shake it off big dawg.”
I’ve never been more confused about whether something was a parenting win or fail.”
8.
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10.
“I always say if you aren’t yelling at your kids, you’re not spending enough time with them.” – Reese Witherspoon
11.
*In Mary Poppin’s voice* “Kids, time to go!”
15 minutes later… *Christian Bale’s Batman voice* “I said, let’s go.”
12.
Mom has a recipe for iced coffee:
Have kids. Make some coffee. Forget that you made one. Put it in the microwave. Forget that it was put in the microwave. Have it cold.
13.
You know you are a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s breakfast was too cold.
14.
“Good luck robbing my house. My home security system is LEGOs on the floor.”
15.
“I’ve conquered a lot of things… blood clots in my lungs — twice, knee and foot surgeries, winning Grand Slams being down match point, to name just a few. But I found out by far the hardest is figuring out a stroller!” – Serena Williams
16.
“Mom, stop you are not funny. You never make good jokes.”
“I made you.”
17.
“At my daughter’s 4-year checkup, the doctor said she should be eating a varied diet and to make sure she’s eating a good amount from each food group and I think she said a bit about trying new foods but not sure cause I got distracted wondering if she’d ever actually met a 4yo.”
18.
“I just watched my child individually pick off and eat every sprinkle on the donut I gave her. She has the patience for that, but can’t wait 30 seconds for me to pee by myself.”
19.
Nothing is lost until Mom finds it.
20.
“My daughter is crying because her sister farted and I sprayed air freshener before she had a chance to sniff it. I’m raising savages.”
21.
“My daughter is crying because her sister farted and I sprayed air freshener before she had a chance to sniff it. I’m raising savages.”
22.
“Mike, can’t you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?” – Michelangelo’s mother
23.
“When my kid tells me they got hurt doing exactly what I told them to stop doing so they wouldn’t get hurt, I say, “Oh noooooo…””
24.
The person who wrote the song “Easy Like Sunday Morning”, did not have children.
25.
“My kids are never better friends than when it’s 30 minutes past bedtime, and they won’t stop giggling.”
26.
“My mom once asked me to close the patio door because I was “letting the WiFi out.”
27.
“I love to play hide-and-seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can’t find me until after high school.”
28.
“My 4yo grabbed the egg off my egg and cheese sandwich, put it on her plate, took a bite of it, and then grabbed the rest in her hand, squeezed it shut, and handed it back to me saying she didn’t want it anymore. And this… THIS is why I can’t have nice things.”
29.
“I always thought I’d be a patient mom, but I don’t like who I become 30 seconds into my son’s guided tour of his Minecraft village.”
30.
“No one told me I would be coming home in diapers, too.” – Chrissy Teigen
